Let’s talk about respect when it comes to marriage. We learn in the Bible that husbands should be respected by their wives as they would respect the God of the heavens. Do we do this in the way we believe the person should be treated? No. It is the way the person desires to be respected. We can try all we want to, to make someone happy, but if we disregard what means most to that person, it can all be for naught. it is hard for our spouse to see the good we are doing for them if we disregard what they desire most. Therefore, it is important to ask our spouse what they need from us. We do the same with God. We ask Him also what He needs from us. Your spouse may be involved in a Church or Christian ministry and want to have someone to talk to about things. Doing this on a daily basis will make them feel respected. The same can be said about the things I do in my “Daily Christian Devotionals” ministry. As my wife shows interest in it, while reading different writings, asking questions, seeing how things are going, and how she can help, this shows that she respects me in what I am doing for God. The same things are said about my love for my wife. We should be finding out the needs of our wife and then fulfilling them on a basis also. It can be the chores we do around the house, our personal time with them, asking about their job and their day, and many other things. So having that conversation with them to find out is very important.
It is true that men need to be respected in the marriage, while women need our love. I do agree also that men need love, so when this is happening, love is felt between them both equally. Paul wrote, “wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body. Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing. Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it; That he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word, that he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish. So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself.” (Ephesians 5:22-28) When wives begin to submit themselves to their husbands, while showing them the respect they deserve, it will come naturally to keep doing this over time. However, when wives do not do this, it comes with resentment and much arguing. If they just knew that God is the same way with us. We cannot make up a God in our own minds and respect Him the way we wish He should be treated, but know Him by what the Bible says and respect Him in what it is written. If you could just learn this one thing, then your marriage will flourish. Amen.
Let us pray:
Oh Lord, please bless my marriage. Some days are hard and I need Your strength to know how things can get better. Help me to love my wife as You love the church. May she also learn to respect me and my needs. I know that when this happens, love will flourish. Otherwise, arguments and contention will arise. Lord, I love You so much and I wish to love my wife in the same way. Help me to continue to do this even if I am not being respected by her in the way I desire. Give me over to a new mindset of what I can do to restore the missing pieces of love in my marriage now. It might take time to get us to the point that we were at when we first got married, but as things progress it will make all the burdens lighter. Therefore, I ask that You take my hand and the hand of my wife. Help us become one not only in intimacy, but in the way we love and respect one another. Once this happens, all the bickering and complaining about small things will stop. I have seen this for a fact and I know that You can help us fulfill what You desire for us both in this marriage. It is my prayer that You lead me from doing things that the flesh desires, but what the Holy Spirit desires instead. And help us to learn to love and respect each other in this marriage the same way we love and respect You. I believe in You, Lord. I trust in You, God. I love You so much and give You praise. Amen.